I would like to grow old in my own home, surrounded by the people I love, with all of my favorite things around me.
That’s the dream, isn’t it?
As we grow older, the thought of making big changes loses most of its appeal. It is difficult to imagine a future better than the comfort of being in your home, surrounded by familiar things. In fact, surveys tell us that 80% of seniors want to stay in their homes, but less than half of those think they’ll be able to do so in the event of future physical limitations, mental decline, financial concerns, or even loneliness.
In fact: According to a study by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, nearly 70% of people who are 65 now are going to require long-term care services and support at some point in their life.
So why aren’t more of us making a plan for future housing? For many, it’s the fact that they don’t know where to begin, and for others, it’s simply too unsettling to think about.
Among my most vivid childhood memories are the days following the sudden loss of my grandfather. My parents scrambled to help my grandmother make decisions about where she would live, which ended up being with us. Now, as a professional working with seniors, I know the only way to minimize the type of stress we faced is to have a plan.
When I talk about downsizing, some people are focused and ready to make decisions about their futures. I have seen how their diligence and willingness to make a plan have benefitted them and their families. Others are more resistant to change. They mostly fall into two schools of thought:
- I know I’ll need to downsize eventually, but I’m not ready for that yet! These clients have enjoyed good health and mobility, but circumstances may be changing for them. Maybe they’ve had a health scare or a new diagnosis, or maybe they are the caregiver for a spouse, and that situation is becoming unsustainable. These clients are usually optimistic about their ability to make changes, but they keep pushing tough decisions back for another day.
- I don’t have any intention of leaving my home… EVER. These clients know their limitations, and they feel overwhelmed by the effort it would take to move from one place to another. Unlike my clients who put off big decisions, these clients feel helpless, like they have already lost control, and would prefer big decisions be made after they are gone, saving them from the anxiety of it all. Unfortunately, this burden then falls on the family members instead, and that same anxiety is just passed on to someone else.
Do either of these resonate with you?
I understand. That’s why, in today’s blog, I share some preemptive steps you can take to maintain control of your future.
Let’s start building your plan.
First: Know What You Want
Remember, you are here because you know there are changes coming in your future. It is important to you—and to your family—that you are in a place that is safe, comfortable, and easy to maintain. There are benefits to making decisions to achieve this goal for yourself before circumstances require big changes. No one knows what you want better than you!
By acting early and proactively planning for your future, you take away the need for others to make these decisions for you. Start by asking yourself some essential questions:
- Lifestyle Preferences: Do you want to remain in your current home, or are you open to downsizing? Would you prefer to live in a senior community with social activities, or do you value something else?
- Location: Do you want to stay where you are, or are you interested in relocating to a different city or state? Is proximity to healthcare facilities important to you?
- Care Needs: Do you require assistance with daily activities, or are you fully independent? Do you anticipate needing more care in the future, and how might that influence your decision?
It’s so important to think through these questions before change is necessary. Consider these two clients of mine:
Jean and Jerry. Jean and Jerry lived far from family and medical care. When Jean was diagnosed with dementia, they knew it made sense to make changes. Still, it was difficult to make decisions because Jerry would get overwhelmed with the thought of downsizing and moving and also the thought of changing their home to make it a safe option. When I met with them, Jerry fretted about their “stuff” but put off taking action, and Jean’s dementia continued to progress.
Unfortunately, Jerry died unexpectedly before he could help transition Jean to better housing, and the unexpected and hectic move was very hard on her. Their last days together could have been in a safe environment, surrounded by a few familiar things if they could have found a way to accept help and make changes early.
John and Bonnie. John and Bonnie also lived far away from their family, and they enjoyed an active lifestyle until John suffered a stroke. Bonnie took on the role of full-time caregiver, and they modified their home to accommodate John’s condition. John and Bonnie’s family were concerned about Bonnie’s health and their remote location and continued to press them to consider a living situation with more help. After we met, Bonnie accepted the reality of an increased need for help, and I was able to help the couple through the process of downsizing their belongings and moving into a continuing-care retirement community. In this new environment, John received top-notch care, and Bonnie could give up her caregiving responsibilities and enjoy her time with John until he passed away months later. By then, she had made great new friends and now enjoys a full, independent life in a community she loves.
The difference between the outcomes for these two clients with similar circumstances was vast. Both couples were hesitant to make changes despite the realities they were facing. Jean and Jerry put off making their plan until the decisions were no longer theirs to make, and it was a very difficult time for the surviving spouse and family.
John and Bonnie were able to act on my advice and maintained control of their housing decisions. Because of this, they could live out John’s last months in a safe and comfortable place for both of them, and their family was so grateful.
Carefully considering the questions presented above will help your family understand your preferences, needs, and values and help you clarify what’s most important to you in your living situation. This knowledge is the foundation upon which you’ll build your plan.
Next: Plan for What You Want
Once you know what you want, it’s time to start planning. This involves both financial and practical considerations to ensure that your desires align with reality. Is this the part that feels overwhelming? Keep reading!
Here are some of the most important things to consider:
- Financial: This is a big one, and it’s often the one my clients name as a primary concern. Even if you have saved for your retirement years, we are living longer these days. It’s necessary to take a careful look at your financial picture. Let’s start here!
- Evaluate your current financial situation and determine what you can afford. Jot down your monthly expenses and income. If you anticipate a change in your care needs, check into the cost of in-home care. As you think about your future, write down the expenses you know for certain. For those that you don’t, write them down anyway and add a question mark. Once you have on paper what you know you don’t know, you can begin to seek answers from trusted friends and professionals.
- Research and consider the costs of different housing options, including maintenance, utilities, and potential healthcare expenses. Remember, whether you hope to stay in your home or will prepare to sell it, it is important to stay on top of basic maintenance. If you are moving, be realistic about how much you will be involved in downsizing, packing, and hauling to a new place.
- If you’re thinking about moving to a senior community, visit and gather information to help you understand the pricing structure, unit availability, and any long-term financial commitments of each community.
- Health: Think about your current health and how it might change in the coming years. Planning for potential healthcare needs, such as in-home care, assisted living, or memory care, is crucial. Investigate the options that are available in your desired location and carefully consider what support systems you might need.
- Legal: Ensure your legal documents, such as a will, power of attorney, and advance healthcare directive, are up to date. These documents should reflect your wishes and be easily accessible to those who might need them.
- Downsizing: Take a look around your home and think about how you can simplify your belongings. Even if you are able to stay in your home, using this time to re-home certain belongings can be an enormous help to your family and can bring a lot of joy as well. If you’re planning to move out of your home, downsizing can help ease the mental and financial burden.
Once you have a plan in mind, your hardest work is done. The next part is more about working with the people who can make it all happen. Consult with professionals, such as financial advisors, attorneys, healthcare providers, and downsizing experts like Silver Pathways. They can offer valuable advice and help you refine your plan. Ensure they are aware of your preferences so they can guide you accordingly.
A well-thought-out, written plan provides a clear roadmap for achieving what you want. It helps you anticipate challenges and ensures you and your loved ones are prepared to make informed decisions when the time comes. Once you have a plan, start taking action!
It is devastating to watch a plan fall apart because a client thought they had plenty of time. At Silver Pathways, meeting with clients who have a solid plan for their own future (or who are open to working with us to develop one) makes all the difference between a fulfilling downsizing experience and a difficult one.
Finally: Communicate What You Want
Knowing and planning are essential, but the final step—communication—brings it all together. It’s important to share your plans and wishes with those who will be involved in your future care and living arrangements.
- Family Discussions: Talk to your family members and loved ones about your preferences and plans. These can be difficult conversations, but they are necessary to ensure everyone is on the same page. Having a clear plan is especially helpful to your support system because it gives them confidence that they will be able to fulfill your wishes in the event they need to step in to help, and this is such a gift to them. Be clear about your desires and explain the reasoning behind your decisions. This can help prevent misunderstandings and conflicts down the road.
- Documentation: Put your plans in writing. Having everything written down ensures that your intentions are clear. Share these documents with your family and professionals involved in your care.
Effective communication is key to making sure your wishes are respected and followed. It also helps those around you feel confident in supporting your decisions.
Making decisions about housing and care as a senior doesn’t have to be complicated. By knowing what you want, planning for what you want, and communicating what you want, you can take control of your future.
This approach not only empowers you but also provides peace of mind for your loved ones, knowing that your wishes are understood and will be honored! Take the time to think through each step, and you’ll be well on your way to making decisions that truly reflect your desires and needs.
Maybe you still feel like sticking your head in the sand has a lot of appeal, but in reality, that just takes away your option to write your own future just the way you want it. Imagine how much better it would be for everyone if you have a plan.
If you’re ready to face your fears head first and start a personalized downsizing conversation with me now, I welcome it! I’m Jill Hart, and I am an organizing & real estate professional who specializes in downsizing.
When you work with me one-on-one, you can expect to:
- Get a plan. We’ll make a short list of goals for your new, streamlined space, and then, we’ll help you stick to it!
- Get a team. Our in-house team of specialists will be empathetic and knowledgeable, and we know the perfect vendor for every task.
- Get on with your life! We’ll help you move through that feeling of loss and settle into your new place with exactly what you need.
Simply click here to schedule a discovery call with me to explore my services. It’s free and you won’t ever feel pressured to work with me. I’m here to serve. Thanks for reading!
| Is it time to downsize? This 3-minute downsizing quiz will help you uncover insights into your emotional attachment, organizational skills, and future planning. Don’t leave your next chapter to chance—let’s get started together by gaining clarity on your downsizing journey! Click here to take the quiz. |
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Hi, I’m Jill Hart.
Back to my earliest memories with my grandmother, I’ve always had a desire to be around those living out the later chapters of their lives. That said, it made sense that my love for real estate didn’t really grab hold until I figured out I could use my skills to help this familiar population. Especially since, during a season of downsizing, support is a must!
I quickly realized that my clients didn’t just need to find different places to live or to sell their homes; they needed to make tough decisions about what to keep and what to share. They needed to organize, pack, and deliver donations. They needed to clean, make updates, and get ready to sell. Plus, they needed to do all this while managing their family’s feelings and opinions (and their own).
That’s why I built this business. We take care of planning, organizing, hauling, and cleaning, and we mix in more traditional real estate services when our clients need them. No matter your circumstances (or fears!), we make downsizing a whole lot easier.
Click Here to Schedule a Discovery Call
Learn more at silverpathwayshome.com.